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The Riot Act
by The Usual Gang of Fools
QUOTE OF THE YEAR (SO FAR:) "The people who 'reach out' are also those whose thinking is always 'blue
sky,' who can’t describe anything vaguely contemporary without incorrectly
enlisting phrases such as 'minimalist' or 'modernist' and who don’t have to
hurry to the airport but need to 'rocket' there. But for now if we can just
get everyone to delete 'reach out' from their memory banks, opening our
emails in 2010 will be a less tense experience. And if they don’t, perhaps
we’ll have to reach out – and grab them by the throat." A Marist College poll shows how much we hate certain overused words. The top 5 most annoying words: It may be a sign of our cultural laziness that we allow our communication to be so debased. When it comes to the rich, cultural heritage of the English language, we should be ashamed to obfuscate our precious language. Anyway at the end of the day, it is what it is, you know. Whatever.
THE TOP NINE OR TEN CATCH-PHRASES OF THE 21ST CENTURY SO
FAR... Other political catchphrases of the decade are: Global warming/climate change (2000) War on terror (2001) Weapons of mass destruction (2002) Embedded (2003) Shock and awe (2003) The audacity of hope (2007) Economic meltdown/financial tsunami (2008) Obamamania (2008)... NOW LISTEN UP YOU PEOPLE!! On blogs such as this one you're supposed to rant, so I just wanted to mention that one of the things that really bugs me about some people is when they say, "Listen up!" As soon as you say that I immediately stop listening. If I were in the military and my DI said that, I'd listen. I'm not so I don't. I also stop listening to anyone who refers to me as part of a crowd when that person addresses us as "You people," or even worse, just "people." As in "listen up, people." What? I was listening kindly till you addressed me in that demeaning, stupid way. -- MS GO GREEN AND SAVE THE PLANET!
(Not really, it's just corporate hype to save some bucks) The truth is it takes the procurement and refining of lots of metals and minerals (including gold and silver) and extensive molding of plastics and the use of hydrocarbons just to make a computer. And guess how you run a computer? Electricity that comes largely from the combustion of coal. And never you mind that dead electronic devices have become a huge stream of toxic waste that we have yet to fully deal with. I like paper bills and paper junk mail. Besides, I'm Irish so I'm already green. BREAKING THE ICE ...We got a new refrigerator not too long ago. When it happened my family leapt into the 21st Century. It's really nice because you don't have to use trays to make ice. The icemaker works great, but it's just not the same as having big squares of ice for a soft drink. These ice "cubes" are like big, thick half-moons. Every time I reach for a handful of ice, I drop at least one "cube" on the floor. I'm going to try the built-in ice crusher soon. I'll probably find a way to drop some of that on the floor too. But since they're not ice "cubes" anymore, what do I say to my family? "Oh, I just spilled another ice half moon again?" "Oh, look, again I spilled some slush?" They're already worried about me. I can't say that. -- MS THE TROUBLE WITH THE NEW H1N1 FLU SHOTS IS MARKETING! Why does the cost of H1N1 flu shots keep going down? Two months ago they were unavailable in my area, then when the vaccine showed up it was $20 a shot. Now it's $10. Maybe they'd sell more of the shots if they tried a different marketing approach. So many drugs have happy, smiley names, like Celebrex ("Celebrex good times, come on!!") and Ascenden ("I'm ascending, I'm floating my way up into the sky, ahhhhhhh") and even old Dimetapp (sounds cheap, huh?...but based on the real price they ought to call it "50-cents-a-tapp"). The drug companies should rename the H1N1 shot and maybe call it "FluOver," like "YOUR flu fears are OVER!" (or like One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest). Or maybe they should call it "Affluent" to give consumers the feeling they're rich because they've had their shot. Millions of people are out of work. We need to hear words like "affluent." Considering how dangerous the shot appears to be to some people, maybe they should market it as "Advench-aflu." ("Be adventurous! Get pandemic relief with Advenchaflu!") Or just market it as protection against a very strange flu, and base the campaign on price ("Your expensive $20 flu shot is now PRICED JUST RIGHT! Get your shot, give us a $20 bill and we'll give you TEN DOLLARS BACK, guaranteed! Now that's change you can believe in!"). SIX
STRANGE FOODS Canned condensed soup contains about 90% of the sodium (salt) you should have in one day. AlterNet says Spam is essentially pork-flavored Jello. And what are those things that look like blueberries in blueberry waffles? Are they blueberries? No, they're bits of blueberry-flavored sugar. And you may have looked at the ingredients in Kraft's guacamole dip and noticed that avacado is not an ingredient. Real guacamole is always made with avocado, so how does Kraft do it? Flavoring. AlterNet points out that when this was brought to Kraft's attention, the dip was renamed "guacamole-flavored" dip. With as much Easy Cheese, Spam, Oreos and condensed soup we were fed when we were children, how did we live through childhood? TOP 100 funniest one-liners on the internet
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The Shiloh Letter by
Mike Shiloh
The Political Independent Pronounced SHY-low, so don't accept cheap imitations. Mike Shiloh, an editor at TheLatest.Net, is an award-winning broadcast news reporter, anchor and Internet writer, a regular on CNN, as heard on KTRH, KRBE, KILT, KTRH, KKBQ, KSEV and KQUE. 31% say America needs 3rd party According to the poll, more than 80% see problems with America's two-party system -- with 31% believing it's seriously broken and that America needs a third party, and with another 52% saying that it has real problems but that it can still work with some improvements. Only 15% of Americans believe the two-party system works fairly well. It was interesting to hear Dennis Miller on his syndicated radio show Wednesday night (5/12) say that if the Republicans don't take their winnings in this November's election and do something extraordinarily decisive, he's now willing to go Independent-3rd-Party. From a years-long Republican like Miller, that means something significant. He sounded very serious. Kind of like when Michael Reagan (President Reagan's adopted son) went "very" Independent in 1999. Barack Obama plans to punish BP with tax hike as Gulf spill worsens As I was saying before we were so rudely interrupted, "Now is the time of the New Independents. The world is changing fast. It's time to make a new beginning for voters who are not Democrats, who are not Republicans. It's time to be very serious...but have some fun too." Many are good at jobs that are vanishing Millions who have already been unemployed for months, if not years, will most likely remain that way even as the overall job market continues to improve, economists say. The occupations they worked in, and the skills they currently possess, are never coming back in style. And the demand for new types of skills moves a lot more quickly than workers — especially older and less mobile workers — are able to retrain and gain those skills.
Obama gives unions sweeping new power to
organize What Oil Shortage? The latest data from the Energy Dept.'s Energy Information Association shows that as of mid-March U.S. refiners were operating at 81 percent of capacity. There are 6 million barrels per day being deliberately left in the ground by the world’s oil producers. A PRECARIOUS ECONOMY...AND NOW IT'S FUNDRAISING TIME! The Postal Service has been threatening to stop Saturday mail delivery for decades...but in this bad economy and with email and social media proliferating, the USPS may -- may -- finally get its wish. "Delayed effects of the worst US recession" could close charities.
Fortune "Magazine:" Americans are "fearful" because of the loss of
jobs...but corporations are doing better than they have in a while Yes, 47% of Households Owe No Taxes. But Look Closer...
Jobless claims in another surprise surge
Foreclosure rates surge, biggest jump in 5 years Giving up "television" -- thanks to the Recession?: By the end of last year, almost 800,000 U.S. homes ditched their cable, satellite or telco carrier in favor of watching their favorite television shows online, using Netflix rentals or even via over-the-air antennas, according to a new report from the Toronto-based Convergence Consulting Group. A question for those who say the housing and loan industries are in recovery: What about the resets in mortgages coming up over the next three years? Mortgages that used variable interest rates in the "Alternative-A" category will start to reset over the next few months. "Alt-A" -- meaning houses that cost a lot more than those in the "Subprime" category, and it was the Subprime mortgages that set off the mortgage crisis two years ago. Resets meaning that variable rates will increase and we don't know how many of those holding the mortgages will be unable to keep up the payments. We won't know how bad the coming resets will affect the economy until later this year, and the resets will continue through 2013. A fundraising letter we received from Vice President Joe Biden: Under the misguided leadership of the Republicans, "our economy was in shambles. In fact, just days before the inauguration, we'd received news that another 700,000 Americans had lost their jobs....One year later we have brought the economy back from the brink of collapse. We are now in the process of building the economy of the future -- an economy in which America's besieged middle class shares in the wealth they create. "Republicans want," Biden continues, "to stop us from expanding health care to the millions of Americans who don't have it. They want to stop us from rebuilding our economy and creating the jobs that Americans so desperately need. And they want to stop us from enacting the financial reforms that will prevent Wall Street from ever taking up to the brink of economic collapse again... I served in the Senate for 36 years and in all that time, I have never seen more Republicans committed to permanent, unyielding obstruction." Emphasis is the vice president's, who goes on to say that the November election this year will be crucial. Unemployment Rate for College Graduates Highest on Record We're going to have zombie capitalism for the next 15-20 years,' says Jim Rogers Layoffs, bankruptcies: Daily Job Cuts WITH THAT IN MIND, IT'S LESS THAN SIX MONTHS TILL THE MIDTERM ELECTIONS, SO IT'S FUNDRAISING SEASON BOYS AND GIRLS! It seems like half the political fundraising mail we get are in the form of a "poll," "survey" or "inquiry." Perhaps the Democratic National Committee and the Republicans are interested in what we think, but most likely it's a marketing gimmick. One of the hallmarks of modern marketing is the "Call to Action," meaning get the marketing target to do something, anything. Filling out opinion forms is a good call to action, especially if it causes recipients to send the form back -- along with a check. Perhaps neither the Republicans nor the Democrats particularly care what Independents think, I guess, until it's election time. Of course, none of the questions in these "polls" would be considered scientific in any way; they're always written to the bias of the recipient. For instance, one question from the ACLU fundraising letter asks, "The ACLU is urging Congress and the Obama administration to aggressively get the truth out about abuses of power and violations of the law during the Bush administration and pressing for a commitment to hold high-ranking officials accountable for any and all serious violations. Do not believe? Somewhat believe? Believe? Strongly believe?" Republican fundraising mail we get seems to invariably use the term "Socialist" in connection with President Obama. Nearly all of the Democrat-affiliated groups point to Republicans as the reason the progressive agenda is "in trouble." Most say President Obama has "pulled our economy back from the brink of collapse." Many talk ominously about an "energized GOP." The Union of Concerned Scientists is circulating a "petition" calling on ExxonMobil to "take the lead in the research and development of renewable energy sources" and is calling on Wendy's restaurants to "reduce the purchase of meat produced from animals that are given antibiotics when they are not sick." The Democratic Governors Association (dedicated to electing state governors from the Democratic Party) points out that 37 governors races are at risk for Republican takeover in this year's elections. Governors will of course have a pivotal role in redistricting. And "GOP insiders say 25 to 30 congressional seats could go to Republicans as a result of" redistricting. A number of Republican fundraising letters seem to be attempting re-emphasize basics: "Limited government, limited spending, legal immigration, the national motto "In God We Trust" and "believing in our troops and our freedom." Most of them appear most concerned about "policies that cost billions" and don't make any sense, like the "cap and trade" bill and Obamacare. Emily's List is recruiting Democrats -- especially women -- to run for office or at least support candidates who reflect the pro-choice agenda. The group -- dedicated to placing pro-choice women into office -- calls this year's midterm election "perhaps the toughest ever." Officially, Emily's List says Republicans are to blame for the limited successes the Democratic Party has had over the past 4 years, especially in the last two. In letter after letter, Democratic pollsters and fundraisers are calling this a "critical year," concerned about the increasing political opposition from Republicans. Notable are fundraising letters from James Carville and Nancy Pelosi, who's letter for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee is promising a dollar-for-dollar match of private contributions by "a group of committed Democrats." The League of Women Voters is making an issue of transparency in government, stating that "Americans are concerned that their government is more responsive to special interests with deep pockets than ordinary citizens." They state their support for holding the Obama administration and Congress to more openness and accountability. The league is also asking members whether they're concerned about "protecting individuals' basic Constitutional rights from increased government surveillance and wiretapping." The Southern Poverty Law Center has George McGovern (Democratic presidential candidate 1972) writing letters for fundraising. The connection is: the Law Center's Morris Dees was once a campaign organizer for McGovern's campaign. THE ENDLESS WAR BETWEEN REPUBLICANS AND DEMOCRATS CONTINUES: Opponents of the "Tea Party" movement say they'll do what they can to make Tea Partiers appear to be racist and homophobic. Those opponents say they'll start by infiltrating rallies. There's a rally today in Boston, as members "battle for the soul of America." No Recovery On Main Street Despite talk of an economic recovery, there are a number of signs that the effects of this deep recession continue unabated: personal bankruptcies, for instance. There were 158,000 filed in March alone; that's nearly 7,000 bankruptcies filed each day! The Labor Department said Thursday (April 8) that first-time unemployment claims increased by 18,000 in the week ending April 3, to a seasonally adjusted 460,000. That's worse than economists' estimates of a drop to 435,000, according to a survey by Thomson Reuters. We haven't reached the bottom of the unemployment curve yet; employers are still laying off. "Real" unemployment is at about 20 percent of the US workforce. It's now called "underemployment," meaning all those who are looking for fulltime work but can't find any work AND counting those who have part time jobs but want fulltime jobs. At the height of the Great Depression (1933, 4 years after the 1929 stock market crash) the "real" unemployment rate was about 25 percent. Counting the people who have dropped out of the job market and aren't even looking for work anymore, today's unemployment figure might approach that of the Depression. More than 11,000,000 people are now collecting some type of unemployment compensation. With that kind of unemployment, Americans will probably not look favorably on talk among some in Congress about amnesty for illegal immigrants this year. With so few jobs available for legal residents, the view by many appears to be that amnesty will increase the legal workforce at a time when many are struggling to keep or find jobs. Forbes: Fifty-four percent of Americans surveyed in a new Pew Research Center poll said there had been a time in the past year when they or someone in their household had been without a job or looking for work. A year ago 39% gave that response. That's a huge change--and only one of the many survey indicators revealing the widespread pain from this recession. In another question in the poll, only 10% said there were plenty of jobs available in their communities, while 85% said jobs were hard to find. In a new ABC News and Washington Post poll, a plurality described themselves as middle-class. Of this group, 41% said they were struggling to remain in the middle class, 52% comfortable in it and 6% moving beyond it. AOL's WalletPop's LIST OF STORES CLOSING THIS
YEAR: 2. Blockbuster: The movie rental store will shutter between 500 and 545 "underperforming" domestic company-owned stores. Of these, 253 were closed in January. 3. Jones Apparel: It will close 165 of its specialty retail stores this year, primarily in malls. 4. Waldenbooks: After disappointing holiday sales, parent company Borders Group Inc. will close 182 Waldenbooks Specialty Retail stores, following the closure of 112 stores in 2008 and 66 stores a year from 2001 to 2007. 5. Footlocker: As part of an initiative to consolidate its Foot Locker, Lady Foot Locker, Kid Foot Locker and Footaction operations under one management structure, Foot Locker has already closed 106 "underproductive" stores during the first quarter of 2010 and eliminated 120 corporate positions. The company also closed 179 stores in 2009. 6. Sam's Club: Wal-Mart Stores Inc. is closing 10 financially "underperforming" Sam's Club locations in the United States; however, it also has plans to open six new stores this year. 7. French Connection: The fashion retailer will close 17 "underperforming" stores in the United States and sell its Nicole Farhi business as part of a restructuring plan. 8. Men's Wearhouse: Due to geographic overlap caused by its 2006 acquisition of the AfterHours Formalwear chain, the company has identified 145 stores that it will likely close. 9. Williams Sonoma: The specialty retailer plans to close an undisclosed number of stores, in large, multi-store markets during the next three years. 10. Macy's: The department store plans to close five "underperforming" stores, while also opening new ones. Interviews With Legends of Television Hit the Web Paul Burke, ‘Naked City’ Star, Dies at 83 New Set-Top Box Promises To Bring 3D to Television Patrick Swayze: Near the End, He Said... America's Favorite TV Dad Is... Digital Contacts Will Keep an Eye on Your Vital Signs I still hate the fact that every time I type in the word "Obama" my Spellcheck wants to correct me. It's about time the White House orders a universal Spellcheck correction. I don't want to tell you the alternatives Spellcheck wants to replace "Obama" with. -- MS
It was a sad day when John Hughes died.
He was the brilliantly talented comedy writer and
director who made so many great movies, from the "National Lampoon's
Vacation" films to the "Home Alone" movies to my personal favorites, "The
Breakfast Club" and "16 Candles." Here's a very touching blog from a Hughes fan who got to know him
pretty well and can corroborate Hughes' kindnesses -- and fondness for those
of us who loved his work: Meanwhile, One of the funniest people in America has died. You may not have heard of him, but to me Larry Gelbart was more than just a comedy writer -- he was one of the funniest men of the 20th Century. He wrote one of your favorite TV shows, plays, stories, radio shows and movies, I'll bet. He started making up jokes as a high-school kid, and would tell his jokes to singer/comedian Danny Thomas. It was easy because Gelbart's father was Thomas' barber, so Larry would spin joke after joke, cracking up Thomas with his one-liners, and considering how boring haircuts can be, Thomas must have been quite impressed. (That was the 1930s, when men were men, soldiers were dogs and stylings were haircuts. The great 20th century singer Perry Como started out as a barber. If you've ever heard Como, can you imagine getting Perry to cut your hair, sing you a song, and then have 16-year-old Larry Gelbart tell you a few jokes? The price of a haircut would have gone up! Well, okay, that was way before my time, but I can imagine.)
Danny Thomas, the guy who discovered Gelbart, was also the guy who much
later launched Dick Van Dyke into superstardom (1962). He did the same for
his daughter Marlo Thomas (the TV series "That Girl" 1966), Mary Tyler
Moore, Andy Griffith, Don Knotts and so many others. Thomas kept talking
about that "funny kid" Larry Gelbart.
Soon (still the 1930s-'40s) Gelbart was writing radio material for big stars like Bob Hope, Eddie Cantor and later Jack Paar ("The Tonight Show"). He was also a writer -- along with Woody Allen, Neil Simon, Mel Brooks and other greats -- on Sid Caesar’s genius “Your Show of Shows” TV series in the mid-1950s. That crew of writers was the real-life inspiration for later movies ("My Favorite Year," "Laughter on the 23rd Floor") and TV series (such as "The Dick Van Dyke Show"). Gelbart's biggest hit, though, came 30 years later when he developed "MASH" for television and wrote many of the early (funniest) episodes. He created the character named Klinger. Gelbart also wrote for the stage, his most successful production being “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum." It's one of the big stage success stories. High schools, colleges, regional theaters still perform it today. And you guessed it: he covered all media, writing movies like “Tootsie” and “Oh God.” For cable TV (HBO) he wrote "Barbarians At the Gate" among others. Larry Gelbart lived 81 years. I was privileged to interview him in 1998. He had his wits about him even on an early workaday-weekday California morning, and it ain't easy being funny on the radio at 8 or 9 in the morning, being reminded of events that happened 40 years ago. But he was intelligent and thoughtful and private about his personal life, but hilarious. He lived and breathed comedy, as the cliché goes. For most, he entertained us in ways we may not even remember. Even though you may never have heard of him, if you were to gather all his work together, you would have to agree he was one of the funniest men anyone anywhere can think of. At least we still have his contemporaries, the names we can remember: Woody, Mel and Neil. Perhaps it's a story of the often-thin line between talent and madness... Speaking of the Houston Press, it's now ten years ago that the little Oil Town weekly free-paper did a heartbreaking history on the rise and fall of a quite talented filmmaker from Texas named Eagle Pennell. When I knew him he was one of the most enthusiastic would-be movie
directors you'd ever want to meet. He had such charm because this gangly
young guy dearly loved to talk about movies, just as my friends and I did.
Later he started to become successful and for some reason, his downhill
slide was much too quick. Not long before he seemed ready to descend upon Hollywood with a resume that you might envy, he ended up a homeless derelict. Still, I raise a glass to you, Eagle. I know you wish you could be here to be part of it, both for the glass and to once again talk film. The grande auteur of Eagle's Houston Press story, Steve McVicar, caught up with Pennell for this tender story just as Eagle's psyche eventually caught up with Eagle, you might say. Never mind McVicar's crass judgment that Pennell was a "loser." To me, it's a tragedy in the classic sense of the term: Eagle's insightful movie about hope and hopelessness in The Lone Star State -- The Whole Shootin' Match -- has now been released on DVD: A tribute took place in Toronto the other day for one of the greatest rock groups in history. The Band. Not just any band, THE Band. As I wrote at The Band website back in 1999... The music of The Band will go down as among the best of the 20th century. It invokes a timeless feeling that approaches that of any of the great "orchestras" of the big band era. added to classic images from American country music, religion, history, myths and literature (yes, and film and rock and roll), wedded to a mid-20th century point of view. The Band's music is classic, at once soothing and bold, at once jolting and mystical. It's music for the ages, for all ages. No group of five musicians has done anything like it before or since. And the more you come to understand the music, the more you understand the unique contribution of each artist, each Bandmember. The sharing of the music by each musician -- the musical restraint by each gifted artist in service of the song and the performance -- may be The Band's greatest untold legacy, because each member was (and is -- God rest you, Richard and Rick) a brilliant solo artist alone, lost in a tempest of commercial music trends, saved by membership in this mature and highly-styled collaboration. -- Mike Shiloh Cass Sunstein, US "Regulation Czar:"
Brain food: The [legal] theory of lies
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